Criticizing Music #1: Anaconda (Nicki Minaj)

Updated: Oct 1

For this series, I pick out a random song that I don't enjoy and critique it. This won't be a very detailed series, but this is a place for me to voice out my disappointment on the track I chose to review.

Nicki Minaj needs no introduction. She's the most well-known female rapper out there. Her contribution to the hip-hop industry is noteworthy. However, the music she releases can be polarizing.

One prime example is none other than Anaconda. It was huge back in 2014, both as a song and a meme.

"Di-dick bigger than a tower, I ain't talking about Eiffel's" and "Pussy put his ass to sleep, now he calling me NyQuil" are a couple of the lyrics that make up this song. Bravo, Nicki.

To her credit, she did want the song to be a "joke." Her intents for the track were accomplished. Yet, I doubt she intended for it to sound good.

Two distinct sections made this song unlistenable. The first case is the chorus. The lyric choice for the hook is a repetition of "Oh my gosh, look at her butt." It's lazy, but that's not the biggest issue.

The way it's delivered is, um, questionable? I could find a better word, but how do I do it when describing the vocal delivery?

What we hear is a stereotypical voice of a woman when seeing another woman with a big butt. The tone of voice sounds like she's criticizing (making fun of) the woman's big behind.

I realized that this song made me type "big behind." I blame Anaconda for that. I don't feel comfortable typing words like that.

I can understand the appeal of the hook. It's playful at best. Even though I don't vibe with the lyrics and vocal tone, it's easy to get why the track became popular. However, this section is the warning for something terrible about to happen.

Get ready because I will be analyzing the worst 45 seconds you'll hear in your life!

At 3:05, Nicki drops one of the worst outros in the history of music. It's an accomplishment I'll give to her, though it's not positive (and never will be).

What makes this section worse? Well, the beginning of it is enough to convince you of its ridiculousness- "Yeah, he love this fat ass (insert hideous laugh)."

It's not what she says (kind of)- it's HOW she says it. Unfortunately, the torture doesn't end here.

The rest of this punishment consists of these lyrics:

"Yeah, this one is for my bitches with a fat ass in the fucking club

I said, where my fat ass big bitches in the club?

Fuck those skinny bitches, fuck those skinny bitches in the club

I wanna see all the big fat-ass bitches in the muthafuckin' club

Fuck you if you skinny, bitches, what? C'Yeah."

These lyrics caught the attention of body-shaming skinnier girls to empower girls with fuller figures. This obviously doesn't hurt me, but I can understand the criticism. Alternatively, Nicki using "skinny bitches" is her criticizing the norms. I'm all in for her denouncing the world's expectations, but I still don't vibe with her word choices and vocal delivery.

After the "dramatic" lyrics, she delivers another ridiculous laugh, followed by strange noises. Did this inspire Cardi B?

Anyway, Nicki ends this torment on a high note- "I got a big fat ass."

Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for Nicki Minaj!

Seriously though, what the fuck did I just witnessed? At least the last remaining moment of the song wasn't as ridiculous as the 45-second torture. The only piece that made this track interesting was the prominent sample of Sir Mix-a-Lot's Baby Got Back. However, just because I say it's interesting doesn't mean it's good. I was feeling flat about the instrumental for the majority of Anaconda. The only redeeming factor came in after Nicki's "I got a big fat ass." I thought the instrumental there was the only bright spot of the entire track.

Overall, I concluded that the making of the song is more entertaining than the song itself. Well, the track itself is entertaining, but that's due to how raunchy and ridiculous it sounds. From the lyrics to Nicki's delivery, I can't help but laugh at the atrocity made. I don't mind listening to the song as a joke. Nicki was "being dumb" with the track. Even so, if you try to convince me that this song is good, then I'll convince myself that humans can grow wings.

That was an odd saying, but that's how I feel about Anaconda. It will never sound good to my ears.

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